Future Fundraising Now

Two ways to be a better nonprofit -- and raise more funds

A great way to do better fundraising is to be better.

Let me tell you about something that's better. It's a line of blank notebooks called Moleskine. The small one that I use costs around $10. Pretty dumb, huh? I could get a notebook at the drugstore for under $2. And every time I go to a conference I bring home two or three little notebooks for free.

Yet I shell out ten bucks for a Moleskine. Because it's better than the other options:

1. It has better features

The paper is acid free, so it won't turn brown and crumble in a few years. The pages are rounded off, so they don't get dog-eared. It's bound so it can lie open flat. There's a ribbon bookmark. There's an elastic strap that holds it shut. The oilcloth cover looks and feels nice.

All around, it's well made and a pleasure to use.

Other manufacturers have noticed and are selling high-end notebooks. Some probably even better than Moleskine. Or at a lower cost. That's why Moleskine's second advantage is so important ...

2. It has a better story

This isn't just any notebook. It's been around for a long time, and was supposedly used by some very cool people, like Picasso, Van Gogh, Mallarmé, and Hemingway.

Travel writer Bruce Chatwin was obsessed with his Moleskines. Part of the story is that the original manufacturer died; when Chatwin tried to buy some at his favorite Paris bookshop, he was told, "Le vrai moleskine n'est plus." That quote is always in French in the Moleskine story -- it flatters me that they tell it to me without a translation -- of course I understand the (very easy) French!

Moleskine reeks of creativity, sophistication, and quality. The features and the story come together to make it almost irresistible. I know writers who swear Moleskine notebooks are part of what makes them able to write well.

Can you do this with your nonprofit mission? Actually make it better and give it a better story? Think about it...

How to create better features

• You could be noticeably more effective than the usual organization. But it would have to be in a way the non-experts could understand and appreciate.
  
• You could leverage donors' gift in some powerful way.
  
• You could acknowledge donors' giving in some very exciting way.
  
• You could make donors part of a community or group that they love belonging to.
  

How to tell a better story

• Connect with your donors' aspirations better than others.
  
• Really give them something they can brag about when they give.
  
• Connect to a great heritage that donors would be proud to be part of. (This might be an especially powerful for some religious and cultural organizations.)
  
• Have amazing spokespersons (living or dead).
  
• Strongly affirm donors' beliefs about themselves.
  

You can't make this stuff up. You have to make it real.

But it's possible to make it real, if your entire organization is part of the effort.

And the reward? How cool would it be to become the "Moleskine of Nonprofits"?

(This post first appeared on May 3, 2017.)

The writing secret that can double your fundraising success

Easier to read, more likely to raise money.

It's pretty simple, but you might not know that to read a lot of fundraising these days. It mimics that turgid style of academic writing, with long, complex sentences and always-choose-the-longer-word vocabulary.

Some fundraisers apparently think that makes them look smart or sophisticated.

It actually makes them look worried about their organization's future. Because writing that way steeply lowers response.

A recent test, reported in We Don't Write So Good, a free ebook from NextAfter and DonorVoice (available for download, registration required) found the following disturbing, though unsurprising result:

... by lowering the reading level of the message from 10th-grade down to a 6th-grade reading level, we observed a 90.8% increase in revenue....

For many people, the only place they've had formal training in writing has been at school. And school teaches academic style: complicated, erudite, formal. Appropriate in the closed world of academia (maybe), but bristling with barriers to engagement and comprehension in the real world, where nobody is being paid (or forced) to read your stuff.

Writing for ease of reading is not easy. It takes more skill, especially if all you know is what you learned in school.

But if you hope to succeed in fundraising, it's a skill you need.

Check your readability. It's built into the grammar check of many programs. Or you there are many online places that will check your reading ease for you.

And write for reading ease.

When you write like an academic, you actively exclude most of your donors, including those with advanced degrees.

And they'll respond by paying less attention, which means they'll give less often. Or never.

When we write like robots

I saw a trailer for a movie the other day, and it had one line that whacked me in the head:

One character says to another: "We thank you for your support."

The line is delivered for laughs, with a syrupy delivery that no normal person would ever use with another normal person -- the stilted wording making it clearly a rather savage form of sarcasm.

It whacked me because I see those exact words and similar ones all the time. Said in all sincerity by nonprofits I respect.

I've written phrases like that myself: That clueless, awkward, not-quite-human language that just pours so easily from our mouths because we've heard it before and it's what you do.

You wouldn't say something so stilted to a person you know. You'd say something friendly, natural, colloquial.

That movie scene is really bothering me.

So I'm making a vow, and you can join me if you'd like:

I will always do my best not to put in writing something that would make me sound like a robot if I said it in person.

I'll check for that kind of garbage writing by reading my stuff aloud and keeping a human listener in my mind.

Because being human is part of the job. Sounding like a robot is a lazy lapse that shouldn't go beyond our first drafts.

Try the "Grandmother Question" to improve your fundraising

In fundraising, the words we use matter.

The "rule" is this:

• Warm, emotional, "family" words are good. They are more likely to move people to give.
  
• Formal, complex, technical words are bad. They can demotivate people from giving.
  

Some of us wish there was a master list of "good" and "bad" words for fundraising. If there is one, I'd like to see it. But Russell James, writing on LinkedIn proposes something that might be better than a huge word list.

He proposes that we ask ourselves a question about our writing: Would you have used this phrase in a normal conversation with your grandmother?

See the post at Using Family Words Not Formal Words in Fundraising Story.

The Grandmother Question gives you a decision point. If you realize you've written something you would not say to Gran ...

Be careful. You might be slipping into technical, formal, or contract language. This language can shift the listener’s frame of mind. It can shift to a detached, defensive, market-exchange perspective. This inhibits sharing.

When you use Grandmother language, you are solidly in fundraising territory. Where we are thinking about sharing, caring, helping, giving.

When you get technical and formal, you are in logical, financial, detached territory. And that is very bad for giving.

The challenge is this: we routinely use technical language with our colleagues and among ourselves. Where it's a useful way to communicate. We do it so often and so skillfully that it sounds "right" to us. It's the proper way to talk about the work our organization does.

But it crushes fundraising.

I urge you to add a step to your fundraising process.

Vividly imagine your grandmother -- or any older relative you knew well and loved. Then read your work out loud to her.

You'll notice right away if you're in good or bad fundraising territory.

And you'll see the results in your fundraising.

The power of directly addressing your reader in fundraising

I recently read a really excellent book that doesn't have anything to do with fundraising: An Elegant Defense: The Extraordinary New Science of the Immune System by Matt Richter (2019).

I learned a lot about the immune system, but I also learned something about fundraising -- something I half-knew before, but now understand more clearly.

As you probably know, the immune system is one of the most complex areas of medical science. And scientists have been learning a lot about it the last few years.

The book tells that story with a mix of stories: Stories of people fighting illness. Stories of discovery, in the past and recently.

Even so, the information is incredibly complex. More so than most of us non-experts can really keep up with.

So the author occasionally steps out of the regular narrative and directly addresses the reader. Here are some examples:

• "...congratulations, reader! You've been introduced to the language of immunology ... one of the most maddening and even counterintuitive lexicons ever contrived."
  
• "Now you know how the T cell and B cell got their names. Still, the breadth of their purpose would take decades to understand...."
  
• "What is a fever? You think you know, right? I did too."
  

He basically talks to the reader and "coaches" us along in a sort of "meta-narrative" that we are part of.

That's a great thing to do in fundraising too.

Our topics are rarely as complex as the human immune system, but we can still encourage our readers to stay involved and to connect with the stories we tell by "guiding" them directly. Comments like this:

• "What happened next will really surprise you..."
  
• "Let me repeat that last part for you. It's very important."
  
• "It broke my heart when I saw her that last time."
  

You step out of the story you're telling and pull the reader in by directly addressing her. You can add color and interpretation that way. Do it well, and it can increase reader engagement with the story. And more engagement leads to more donations.

Your creative writing teacher would probably frown on it. But we're not trying to please her. We're hoping to motivate donors to take action.

Give it a try. Let me know how it goes.

3 steps to avoid sounding completely fake

A lot of fundraising writing uses a tone you'd never use with people you know and care about. If you did, they'd slap your face. Or call 911, seeking immediate help for you.

Here's the kind of writing nonsense I mean:

• Phony superlatives, like "leading," "best," "most important."
  
• Meaningless, high-flown claims, like "cutting-edge" and "pioneering."
  
• Professional jargon that makes sense inside your office, but leaves donors wondering what's up.
  
• Abstractions like "hope," "community," and "justice." They sound noble, but they don't reveal anything specific.
  
• Organizational self-aggrandizement. Look-at-us copy that talks at donors, not to them.
  
• Unnaturally long and complex sentences that abandon all pretense of human speech.
  
• Lawyer-junk like © and ™.
  
• Legal disclaimers and other CYA weasel talk.
  

It all adds up to a tone of voice that nobody would ever use in person.

Your donors, like everyone else, is getting wary about inhuman marketing language. They know it more often than not signifies irrelevance and semi-truthful claims. They prefer authentic, human conversation ... and increasingly ignore the other stuff as the noise it is.

Your nonprofit organization is doing real things. There's no reason to sound phony when you talk about it. It's not like you're struggling to market one of 12 types of virtually identical detergents. Be real!

Here are three steps to keep your writing human:

1. Pretend you're talking to your mother (or someone else you know well). Fake-sounding writing will stand out a mile when you do that.
   
2. Read your copy out loud. If it doesn't sound at least somewhat like speech, send it back for revision.
   
3. Ban the committee writing process. That will always make your copy sound inhuman.
   

How to write for both of your fundraising audiences

How do you read your own fundraising letters?

You probably start at the beginning and read every word until you reach the end.

That's the way one reads when one is being paid to read, or when one is very interested in the contents.

That's not how most people read your fundraising letters. Sorry.

They skim. Glance. Bounce quickly through.

Are you creating messages that work for those readers, or are you writing for that tiny majority who read the way you do?

The smart way is to write Two Letters in One, says the Better Fundraising Blog.

Write a letter that works for both methodical readers and for skimmers.

But here's the weird thing: When you write the "skimmer" version, you've also written the "reader" version. Here's a guide to the skimmer version:

• The top-center or top-right corner of the letter contains a short blurb about the Need or about what the donor’s gift will do to help.
  
• The first three-ish paragraphs tend to summarize the whole letter. They share why the donor’s gift is needed, what the donor’s gift will accomplish, and ask the reader to send in a gift today.
  
• The middle section of the letter shares more details, perhaps shares a story that illustrates the need for the donor to take action.
  
• The last couple of paragraphs tend to repeat what was said in the first three paragraphs.
  

The only thing "wrong" with it for the e very-word readers is that it's repetitive. But that's not going to turn those readers away. Because even the most methodical of readers isn't paying attention to structure. The only people doing that are English teachers ... and you.

When you want to get your message across, write for skimmers.

That's the same as writing for everyone.

7 ways to connect better with your donors

Are you making it hard for your donors to take action?

You might be by making your fundraising less accessible.

The Community Centric Fundraising proposes some ways to improve accessibility at 7 tips to write content that is more accessible:

1. Write plainly, not like you’re sooo fancy. It's easy to slip into "look at me" language the demonstrates your knowledge and professionalism. It's Betty to keep things plain and simple.
   
2. Stack high-value information at the top. Whatever it is you want to say, say it early and say it often!
   
3. Subheadings and paragraph breaks are your friends, so use them. Write for skimmers! Give then plenty of entry points.
   
4. Try to baby-bear bullet points — not too much, not too little — go for just right. Bullet points are good entry points. But if they're boring points -- or too many -- they can do more harm than good.
   
5. When it comes to words, avoid relying on visual emphasis. Some emphasis is good. Too much is like having none at all.
   
6. Be structurally consistent to help people continually find their footing in your writing. People process consistent information more easily.
   
7. Put yourself in your very smart but under-informed reader’s shoes constantly. The hard part. It's tough to "un-know" what you know, but the more you can think like a non-expert, the better your results will be.
   

Never, never, never think simplifying your writing is a form of "dumbing it down." Your donors are smart. But they're not experts, they're paying a lot less attention, and they have many other things to do.

Make it easy, and they'll reward you for it.

The most important paragraph in your fundraising appeal

Yesterday, I showed you a great post from Clairification: Top 10 Fundraising Appeal Writing Tips. In the midst of that post, almost as an aside, was this challenge: Always, always, always include a P.S.; it’s copywriting malpractice not to do so.

It's malpractice all right. And it's very common. You might think there's no need for a P.S. If you think of something you should have said, you'll put it in your next draft, not tacked on in a P.S. Right?

Wrong.

Eye-tracking studies show that a large percentage of letter readers read the P.S. first.

And a good chunk of those read nothing else!

Leaving off a P.S. is the equivalent of sending a couple of sheets of blank paper. No message received!

And, under the assumption that it will be the only passage many donors read, you should include the call to action. Including, possibly:

• The urgency/deadline.
  
• A reminder of what's at stake.
  
• Specific instruction about giving.
  

It's a good practice to write the P.S. first. If you have it polished and clear, you are in a great position for writing the rest of the letter!

10 ways to make your direct mail stronger

Worried about your latest direct mail appeal?

That's okay. You may find some inspiration here from this post at Clairification: Top 10 Fundraising Appeal Writing Tips.

Here are the tips:

1. Begin with drama and get right to the point. Don't "warm up" the way we do in conversation.
   
2. Lead with easy to read, understandable copy and design. Ease of reading is one of the main things that gets and keeps reader engaged. Use readable and larger-than-you-think fonts. Black type against white. Short paragraphs. Wide margins. Plenty of underlining, bold, italic, and other things that break up the gray.
   
3. Use a conversational tone; understand donors are asking questions right off the bat. Don't lecture. Talk. Answer their questions.
   
4. Ask directly two to three times. One ask buried near the end of your letter is pretty much the same as not asking at all. My rule ask ask once or twice per page.
   
5. Avoid jargon like the plague. If you're not sure whether a word is jargon or not, it is. Get a reality check about your writing from non-experts. You'd be surprised how often one can unknowingly use insider or professional jargon, leaving donors out in the cold.
   
6. Talk about outcomes, not processes. Donors aren't giving to fund your processes. They give to make things happen. Your processes are important. But not to your donors.
   
7. Give a compelling reason to give today. If there's no reason to give right now, there's essentially no reason to give at all.
   
8. Flatter the donor; assume the best. Your donors care and are generous. They might not care in the right way, and they might not be as generous as they should be ... but you don't know that about them. Attribute the best and highest motives and virtues to your donors.
   
9. Make the donor feel the appeal is about them. Put some action in front of them -- something they can do to make the world a better place. In their personal story, they are not a minor bit player in the story of your organization. To them, you're the bit player in the adventure of their life.
   
10. Tell the donor specifically what it costs to accomplish what needs to be accomplished. Fundraising is always about problems and donor-sized solutions. Keep to that simple formula.